RELEASE THE KRAKEN / KAREN SWITCH PANEL
RELEASE THE KRAKEN / KAREN SWITCH PANEL
Oh, gallant warriors and indomitable conquerors, heed this call to unleash the relentless might that lies dormant within the depths of the abyss. Awaken the fearsome power of the Kraken, and let it strike terror into the hearts of your foes. No more shall you dwell in the shadows of meekness; now is the time to grasp the ultimate weapon of divine vengeance!
As the battlefield quakes beneath your commanding presence, summon forth the Kraken's wrath and crush your enemies' spirits with a force they can scarcely fathom. With booming authority, let your voice resonate across the lands, echoing the decree that shall shatter their resolve: "RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!!"
In the abyss of dire need and impending terror, when all other options have been exhausted and even the Kraken's might falters, a darker and more dreadful force lurks—the dreaded and abhorrent "Karen."
Beware! Only those physically and psychologically prepared should dare to unleash this formidable power, for it wields a force beyond comprehension, bringing forth public unpleasantness and mass hysteria of Biblical proportions. The risks to oneself and loved ones are grave, and caution must prevail. But in the depths of a battle of wits with a mere "commoner," when victory seems unattainable, and the intervention of a superior being becomes the last hope, the resounding call emerges: "RELEASE THE KAREN."
Proceed with both gravity and solemnity, for the consequences of this summoning are not to be taken lightly. Let the legend of The Karen echo through the ages, a force both revered and dreaded, bringing triumph to the rare few who dare to wield its awesome might. May this power be held in reverence, to be invoked only when the brink of oblivion draws near and all other defenses have fallen.
PANEL TECHNICAL INFORMATION:
THE KRAKEN / THE KAREN RELEASE CONTROL PANEL INCLUDES:
- Multi-layer laser cut switch assembly.
- Real / Operable heavy-duty toggle switch. (20A-125VAC / 15A-250VAC).
- SPST (ON-OFF Configuration).
- SPDT upgrade available on request.
- Accurately sized switch guard and bezels based on the Apollo Command Module.
- Custom fabricated stainless-steel washers.
- Reproduction DZUS for enhanced visuals.
- Damage Direction Indicator. (KRAKEN-HIGH DAMAGE, KAREN-MAX DAMAGE)
- Completely designed, manufactured and assembled in our Orlando facility.
- Ships within 5 days.
- If you need a panel urgently, please contact us and we can expedite your order.
Important usage warning: Although our switch panels are sold as memorabilia & display units, they include industrial grade toggle switch / button hardware as a part of their design. We utilize these components within our simulation projects and wire them in order to make the switches operational. In the case of powered operational use, the owner assumes all risk and liability for proper installation of these products. Concord Aerospace is not liable for any damages caused by the incorrect use or faulty wiring of our products.
THE ANCIENT LEGEND OF THE KAREN
(The Fallen Goddess of Delusion and Unpleasantness)
Depiction of The Karen Getting Banished from Olympus by Zeus.
In the age-old tales of Greece, whispers spoke of "THE KAREN" as the offspring of ENTITLETES, the lesser-known God of Delusion and Entitlement, and PRIVIOS, the Goddess of Privilege. When "THE KAREN" came into the world, all Gods were taken aback to see her bearing the appearance of a 45-year-old, ill-suited woman in sweatpants.
As time passed, "THE KAREN" grew to despise Gods who differed from her. Lacking wit and charm, she only communicated through arguments. When she sensed a losing battle, she'd immediately call for Zeus to intervene.
After years of unrest on Mount Olympus, Zeus, weary of her antics, banished "THE KAREN" for her constant racist tirades and overall demeanor. It's also said that her peculiar hairstyle, modeled after the classic Greek/Corinthian Warrior helmets, irked Ares, God of War. He took it as a mockery of brave soldiers. Whatever the reason, in all historical renditions of the myth, "THE KAREN" was cast out of Olympus for eternity, becoming the Fallen Goddess of Unpleasantness. Legend has it she resides in an underwater chamber beneath the island of Mykonos, forever complaining about the Mediterranean water being wetter than the Aegean. She waits, still, to speak with Poseidon about this matter.
KAREN TRIVIA #1:
The world’s first documented Karen encounter was witnessed by PLATO in 320 BC in the Athens Acropolis Agora, (which was a popular marketplace at the time) when an inebriated KAREN demanded a replacement for a broken olive oil amphora (which she had broken) and persistently insisted on speaking with the manager of the ancient site for both a replacement and a full refund.
WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT KAREN SAFETY:
Like most monsters, the origins of “THE KAREN” is based on folklore and centuries old tales to scare children. After years of research and decades of anthropological research, we now know that “THE KAREN” is in fact a type of human lifeform and not the mythical vengeful demigod as it was believed for centuries.
Unfortunately, there has been an increase in “THE KAREN” sightings in modern times as the species have developed the ability to hide as a normal human in most public places and can assume many shapes, sizes and ages.
For your safety, avoiding a KAREN encounter is the best way to protect yourself and your loved ones. However, there are some basic KAREN SAFETY TIPS you can take away that will make you feel more relaxed and minimize your risk when you are in public areas that might be considered a KAREN habitat. These preventative measures will also give you the confidence that you are living in a modern society, and you are not alone.
HOW TO SPOT A KAREN:
- In most cases Karen is of a “female” form, however in the recent years there has been an increase in the male counterpart population of “Kyles” male subspecies as well.
- Display of increased and violent sense of entitlement and delusion, leading to their often-racist behavior,
- Extreme rude attitude toward customer care and food service employees,
- Heightened sense of self-conviction that they know anything and everything better than any other person, scholar or expert,
- Addiction to authority figures like store managers, restaurant owners and local law enforcement.
IF YOU ENCOUNTER A KAREN:
- STAY CALM: Try to remain calm and avoid sudden movements.
- BACK UP SLOWLY: Never turn your back on a Karen or run. Running could trigger an attack.
- DO NOT STARE: Although it is hard to not look at this train wreck of evolution, the Karen will see a direct stare as a challenge of her dominance or as a mating call on days she gets her haircut.
- GIVE IT SPACE: Make sure you give the Karen enough space to get away and that you are not blocking access to the Karen’s spawn/offspring or food supply.
- ALWAYS BE PREPARED: As a predatory impulse, The Karen is more interested about the hunt than the prey itself. Calmly ignoring the Karen attack will likely infuriate her even more and give you and others witnessing the public display of toxicity an opportunity to start exposing their hypocrisy as a pack.
- IF YOU ARE WITNESSING A KAREN ATTACK: It is said that just watching a Karen attack her prey is enough to cause years of mental anguish even if you are just a mere witness to their public carnage. Always shield your eyes and use your mobile device camera as a protective barrier between you and THE KAREN. This will filter the toxicity getting spewed and will help keeping a proper documentation of the attack which is also called the KAREN KRYPTONITE.
KAREN TRIVIA #2:
The famous book of The Art of War by Chinese military general Sun Wu (Sun Tzu) can be effectively used to fend off a Karen encounter. The use of superior intellect, unconventional means and deception to exert psychological dominance produces invaluable leverage over THE KAREN in a public confrontation. Although a master of war, it is also believed that after dealing with a Karen attack himself, Sun Tzu coined the sentiment “I WOULD NOT WISH A KAREN ON MY WORST ENEMY”.
DISCLAIMER: THE KAREN VS KAREN
At this juncture, the Concord Aerospace team wishes to make clear that our "RELEASE THE KRAKEN / KAREN SWITCH PANEL" is conceived as a lighthearted satirical creation. The term "THE KAREN" is utilized here to delineate a particular behavioral trait. It is crucial to underscore that this endeavor is not intended to undermine or ridicule the genuine human name KAREN, a name deeply rooted in biblical significance denoting "PURE". We approach this matter with due respect, acknowledging the name's historical and cultural significance, separate from the humorous context it takes on in certain contemporary contexts